Sunday, 1 May 2016

Pinch punch, it's the first of the month!



Goodmorning!

Well that's if you want it to be a goodmorning, that is.
This morning when I woke up, I had a bit of an epiphany. Wow, that is a fancy word for a Sunday morning haha. But what occurred this morning was basically this: I grabbed my phone and I saw the date, you know as in the time not the fruit. It's bloody May people, as in almost bloody summer! That's the intention anyway. Last week we saw snow and hail, so that's a bit of a stretch don't you think?

I thought I put some music on, on the Spotify machine and the most wonderful song appeared on the shuffle mode: Power by Jeremy Loops. Whilst listening to this song I realised something and that was that I've haven't been happy the last 2 or 3 weeks.

Sure it has to do with my anxieties and the feeling everything was closing in on me. But I think I made it worse to stay in that negative vibe around it. It mad me unhappy and affected not only my mood and actions, but those people around me as well. I didn't think that would happen, but it has and I think it's a good think that I know this now.
At the moment I'm just finding my way to deal with the anxieties, I don't have the cooping mechanism figured out yet, but one thing is certain. I have to be more positive. Or try to at least. It is not the case that will be better with my anxieties, but I do think that when I'm negative things will worsen.

On that note I am aiming to have a very positive May month! In my opinion my happiness consists of two thing. This is my view on it and if you have another view on it, that's perfect! But this is my rather okay view on it.
1) Do things of what makes you happy. One thing I did last week was just doing stuff I had to do and things I thought was for the better of others. The feeling I had to fit in. The feeling I would others down. And to be honest. Nothing has made me more unhappy and I'm feeling like the anxieties are on the most high point since months.
2) There is this quote my Shakespeare and it's really inspiring for me:

This above all, to thine own self be true

Listen to yourself. Do whatever feels right to do and do that. It's okay if you don't feel okay, it's okay. Just take a moment to pause and reflect on it all. Zoom out and take a deep breath. If you are going to force things, it can lead to worse feelings and more anxious days.

It felt really good writing this all! I'm now listening to uplifting music and I feel a lot better today. If you feel like this or now something else that might help, just leave a comment :)

Here is to a more positive May!
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